If the shoe fits wear it!“If the shoe fits, wear it,” is a saying that many women take literally.

I just received a request from my client Gayle, who has a shoe fetish (OK – is there a woman alive that doesn’t?!) and is having a challenging time deciding which shoes to keep and which to purge. Gayle blogged me last Monday asking for my help.

Hi Michelle,

I hope that you enjoyed the Valentine weekend! I did with my husband. One of the reasons is because I forwarded him your newsletter about “jeans” hoping that he would take the hint when he took me out for Valentine’s day. He did! Thank you! For once he didn’t wear jeans but put on a pair of slacks!:)

I have a question for you.

Two years ago when we cleaned out my closet we got rid of many shoes that I wasn’t wearing for many different reasons. I felt good about it then, but when the summer hit and the new styles of sandals came out, I just couldn’t resist. I went back to my old habit of collecting shoes, and now almost two years later, I am not wearing very many of them. I could really use some advice on what criteria I should go through to purge some of the shoes that I already own and breaking this habit once and for all.

Thanks,
Gayle

Hi, Gayle, First of all, thank you again for forwarding my last newsletter to your husband.  I am delighted that he took the hint and made your Valentine’s extra special! It’s amazing how happy men can make their ladies with just a little effort. 🙂

Secondly, thanks for bringing up such a great question. I know from the many closet audits that I have conducted, that many women struggle with the same thing: too many shoes and many are not being worn.

What can I say? I have struggled with this too and after years of too many shoes, many not being worn, I know I needed to do something. So I came up with a process of questions to answer to help me easily pair down my shoes. I am delighted to share with you what I personally did as I tackled the issue of too many shoes.

This is my 5 step (no pun intended) process. Answer the following questions when looking at each pair of your shoes:

  1. Do you love the shoes? Or were you just desperate for a new pair or needed something in a hurry for an event?
    • If you don’t love the shoes, most likely you are not wearing them. Or if you are wearing them it may be because they fit a need but you are not loving the look. If you don’t love them and don’t need them, give them away. If you don’t love them but they are serving a purpose, start yourself a “shoe list” and make a note to yourself to purchase a pair to replace that pair you need but don’t love, with a pair that fills that need and you do love.
    • If you love the shoe continue with question #2
  2. Are they comfortable?  Meaning, can you actually wear them and enjoy yourself in them?
    • OK, I understand that some of you may have special shoes, that you absolutely love, but can only wear them for a few hours because at the stroke of midnight, your foot swells, turns numb, and you find yourself limping around for the rest of the evening trying to smile as you pretend you are not in pain. I too have been there. Keep the shoes if you must and move on to question #3.
    • If you are one who will no longer suffer for fashion but you just love the shoe and can’t part with it, put them somewhere to display them so you can appreciate them, or pack them in a trunk, out of your “working closet” and pull them out when you want to admire them. Or better yet, give them to a friend who will wear them comfortably, or just donate them. Now…you may also proceed to question #3.
  3. What shape are they in? Are they free of scuff marks and stains? Are the back of the heels or the front toes worn out? Are there any rips, tears or holes though the leather or fabric? Are you walking on metal because the plastic heel came off?
    • If the shoes have any of the above, they may be salvageable. But god forbid, if they have many of the above, please throw them away.  Obviously you loved them well so please add them to your “shoe list” and replace them with a new pair that you love.
    • If you can get the shoes reheeled and cleaned up by your local shoe repair to get them in better shape, I suggest that you do. I have had my favorite pair of boots for years because every summer season I have them cleaned and repaired for the Fall and Winter seasons. For a fraction of what a new pair of shoes cost, a great shoe repair place can make them look almost brand new!
    • If the shoes are in great shape, continue to love them and wear them. Go to question #4 please.
  4. You love certain pairs of shoes. For the most part, they are comfortable, and they are in great shape. but you find you are not wearing them. If you have worked with me, as many of you have, I speak about “competition” and “repetition” with your clothing in your closet. The same rule applies to shoes.
    • For example: If you have many pairs of black heels, say 6 pairs, you are probably only wearing 1-3 pairs and the rest are pretty much left in the dust, collecting dust. The reason is because when an outfit calls for a pair of black shoes, you are going to choose your most favorite shoes to wear. You may love the others but you love the 1-3 pairs even more. And…it may not be 1-3 pairs that you are wearing; you may only be wearing one pair all of the time. This is your favorite pair. It could be that they just work with so many different outfits, from casual to dressy. Or although your other shoes may be comfortable, when you put this particular pair on, you just feel great because they are super comfortable – something you could wear all day or all night long. It really doesn’t matter what the reason is, all that matters is for whatever reason you are not wearing those pair of shoes. Get rid of the “competition.” Give them away to someone who will wear them, or donate them.
    • If you discover early on in the wearing of a new pair of shoes that you absolutely love them – they are super comfortable and work with so many of your outfits – I suggest that if you can afford it, to buy two. Believe me, you will be so happy you did! This way, you can rotate wearing them which ensures that they will stay in great shape longer and you will have them for a longer time. This is where “repetition,” the buying of the same shoes in the same color, can really benefit you.
  5. You love a particular pair of shoes. They are comfortable and so unique. You have nothing like them. But you never wear them! Sometimes we buy something strictly because they are beautiful and make us feel good to look at them. To us, they are a work of art. One or two pairs of these are OK to have hanging around just so you can appreciate their aesthetic beauty. But unless you are in the shoe business, a shoe designer, or a shoe collector displaying them in glass boxes, having more than two pairs of these laying around in your closet is just a waste of precious closet real estate, as well as money. Keep your 1-2 favorites and sell or giveaway the rest. 

Now that you’ve purged some of your shoes and are left with shoes that are comfortable, in great shape and you truly love, the challenge is sticking to your “shoe list.”  Keep the “shoe list” that you made while you were purging. It will remind you to only buy shoes that you really need. Keep it close and it will help you break that “OMG, these are soo cute – I’ve got to have them” habit.

Shoes are so ultra tempting because a great shoe can really make an outfit and not having the right shoe can definitely break an outfit. So, yes, every once in awhile you are probably going to be a bit frivolous and that is OK. We can’t always buy just items that we need, we have wants too. As long as you don’t go overboard, and stick to your “shoe list” most of the time, you should be fine.

To help you be the most successful when shopping for shoes, sticking to your “shoe list” is only one of the 5 rules that I keep in mind so that I don’t buy anything that I don’t really need or so that I don’t create competition between my shoes.

My 5 rules for buying shoes:

  1. Don’t shoe shop without your “shoe list.”
  2. Don’t shop when you are desperate to find something for an event. Plan way ahead or if you don’t have time, wear what you already own. This eliminates the chances of you buying something that you don’t really love or isn’t that comfortable. (This works for clothing too, not just shoes!)
  3. Buy a pair of “nude” heels. When you are challenged by an outfit and don’t know which shoe would be best, sometimes the best shoe is a pair of nude heels. They usually go with everything so make sure that you always have a nice stylish and comfortable pair in your closet.
  4. Don’t buy a pair of shoes that will only work with just one outfit. The shoe you find may be perfect for one outfit but try to find a pair that will be perfect for several outfits. For example: I don’t suggest that you buy that neon orange pump for that special 70’s party dress that you are only going to wear to your BFF’s disco birthday party. Find a modern shoe that has a retro look that you can wear with your disco outfit and then over and over again with your everyday attire.
  5. Don’t let your girlfriends convince you that you’ve got to have it. I know they all mean well but they can get caught up in the excitement too. If you need an excuse, just tell them, your stylist is making you stick to your list! I have no problem being the fall girl to help you break your habit! 🙂

Now, it’s your turn. I’d love to hear from you.  Your insights and inspiration are appreciated so please share your stories in the comments below.

Blog me.

Love,

~Michelle

Sign me up!